In which we learn not to be deceived by bright lights.

WITHOUT A LOVE OF MY OWN

I’m shacked up in another small town, not too far off from the last one. The same one where that soldier boy confronted me about Mal’s holotags (I’ve been wearing them around my neck, hoping to find some Brotherhood people that could help… but no such luck out this way). 

I thought I’d be alright, that my leg wasn’t going to give me a big problem. But it’s been cranky and I can’t even walk without feeling like I’m about to collapse on myself.

The heat isn’t helping any, either.

I don’t know what’s come over me tonight though. I just checked in and trying to settle down for the night, but already my mind’s already racing. Thoughts of Malachi, mostly. I’ve been having a lot of dreams about him, pleasant non-sexual dreams, mind. They’re more like flashbacks than actual dreams though. Feels like I’m right there on the Potomac, sitting next to Mal, talking about how things would be better. The way he’d laugh, the way he’d tell me things would be okay. Things were rough all over, it’s all I ever knew, but Malachi? He was the one to soften the blows, his understanding and empathy always humbled me. I don’t know anyone so selfless.

A part of me wants to go back to DC. A part of me wants to take up the Brotherhood rank, play their scout, let Malachi’s name live on a little longer. I regret not taking his name when I said ‘I do’. 

But as I hear, I’m not too far off from Vegas. They say those bright lights in the distance? That’s New Vegas itself. I couldn’t believe it, but that constant yellow beacon is always on the horizon. Getting brighter and brighter every time I inched closer.

I don’t know what I’m going to find, or what I’m going to do when I arrive in Vegas. I know it’ll be worth it.